Never Would I Have Thought....

Never, if you had asked me in my teens or twenties, would I have thought that being a Mom would be the hardest job I could ever have.

Never would I thought that my weaknesses would emerge and blind me like blaring headlights in the middle of the night.

Never would I have thought that I could love three little people with so much love and conviction, despite the way they make me crazy.

Never would I have thought that there would be times when I wasn't capable, wasn't smart enough, wasn't good enough, wasn't courageous enough to do it all and do it well.

Never would I have thought that an "I love you, Mom" and a hug could melt my heart.

Never would I have thought that forming children into people would be so challenging and yet so rewarding.

Never would I have thought that I would need so much forgiveness and so much grace.

Never would I have thought that each day would bring amazing surprises that show me just how much God loves me.

Never would I have imagined that there would be one job on this earth that could tell me so much about God and how much he loves me despite myself.

Never would I have thought that my resume would include such a wide array of skills including waitress, head chef and baker, maid, creative director, nutritionist, health inspector, financial officer, taxi driver, peacemaker, negotiator, tutor, cheer leader, coach, librarian, teacher, shepherd and official family head of prayer.

As a mom of three, I realize how hard this job really is and how incapable I am of doing it.  I know now that my children will be amazing people not because of me but because of who I am leading them to - their savior, the one who did it all, Jesus.  Today, I realize that every good thing I do is because Jesus fills me.  Every good thing they do is a result of the spirit in them.  I surrender and thankfully I am filled to be all that they need.

Thank you, Lord, for this job - this job that takes me to new places and shows me what it means to truly love!  May my children make me holy and not just happy.  I pray for all of the moms I love, that Jesus would be their guiding strength and wisdom, and I thank them for the thankless job they do every day - one day we will see the fruit emerge in loving, God-following men and women!